Officially Autopilot

I've been thinking lately that I'm not really getting any new pure thoughts or ideas lately. All of the stuff I think about seems to be just recycled thinking either from other people, or from past thoughts. Nothing new seems to be popping up. It's as though I've lost my mental capacity to create new thoughts. Maybe I never WAS able to create them, but I can say that I've felt like I have been able to in the past. I feel that this type of thinking that I like to indulge in has been deteriorating for that last eight or nine months. It could be that I'm out of my mentally growing phase and starting to get into my settling phase of my life. Either way, its exponentially falling right now. A nose dive.

This brings up another question though. Is this "I'm going to settle down" type of thinking, is this a mental choice? Is it possible to just NOT settle? Keep striving for truth to your fullest potential? I feel like I've been side-tracking myself for so long that I just forgot how to conceptualize to an extent. Sure I can still do it, just not as WELL.

As the topic says, it also feels like I'm on autopilot. This seems feeling seems to go pretty much hand in hand with the "creating thoughts" ability. Whenever I feel like I'm sleepwalking through life, I'm not able to create as many pure thoughts.

I wonder If I seem as different to other people as much as I feel different to myself? Maybe I'm becoming "normal". If I am, fuck that. This feeling is SO nostalgic.